Last Updated:
May 16th, 2025
Sexual Anorexia and Addiction | Support Options
What is sexual anorexia?
Sexual anorexia is a term used to describe a condition in which a person avoids or fears sexual intimacy, often to the point of compulsively denying themselves sexual expression or contact.
While it may sound similar to an eating disorder, sexual anorexia is not about food or weight. Anorexia means ‘interrupted appetite’, so in this case, sexual anorexia means an interrupted appetite for sex.
The term “sexual anorexia” was first explored in depth in the early 1990s by Dr. Patrick Carnes, a leading researcher in the field of sexual addiction and recovery. Carnes used it to describe individuals who consistently shun sexual activity despite having a natural capacity for it.
Sexual anorexia can exist on its own or alongside other issues like anxiety, sexual abuse history or even compulsive sexual behaviour, where the person may swing between extremes of avoidance and compulsion.
What are the signs and symptoms of sexual anorexia?
Recognising the signs of sexual anorexia in yourself or someone you care about is an important step towards healing.
Like many conditions tied to emotional pain, sexual anorexia often hides beneath the surface, mistaken for shyness, low libido or simply a lack of interest in intimacy. But when avoidance becomes consistent and distressing, it can deeply impact a person’s relationships and well-being.
By identifying the signs early on, it becomes easier to seek the support necessary to understand and work through what’s really going on.
Here are some common signs and symptoms of sexual anorexia:
| Sign | Description |
| Intense fear of sexual intimacy | The thought of being physically or emotionally close to another person may trigger anxiety or dread, even if there’s a desire for connection deep down. |
| Extreme avoidance of sex or romantic relationships | The person may avoid dating, flirting or any situation that could lead to sexual interaction, often without a clear explanation. |
| Viewing sex as dirty, shameful or dangerous | There may be deep-seated beliefs that sex is wrong or inherently harmful, even when there’s no religious or cultural reason for this outlook. |
| Negative body image or discomfort with physical touch | People with sexual anorexia often feel disconnected from their own bodies and may dislike being touched—even in non-sexual ways. |
| Rigid control over sexual urges or fantasies | They may suppress natural sexual thoughts or judge themselves harshly for experiencing them, leading to guilt or shame. |
| Sudden panic or repulsion during sexual situations | If intimacy does happen, it may be followed by emotional shutdown, disgust or even feelings of self-loathing. |
| Avoidance of media or content with sexual themes | Even mild sexual content in films or books might feel overwhelming or triggering, leading to active avoidance. |
| Fluctuation between sexual avoidance and compulsive sexual behaviour | In some cases, individuals may oscillate between complete avoidance and intense, brief periods of sexual activity, followed by guilt or withdrawal. |
Not everyone will experience all of these signs and they can vary in intensity. But if several of them feel familiar, it might be time to consider speaking with a therapist or professional who understands sexual health and emotional trauma.
What causes sexual anorexia?
There’s no one-size-fits-all answer here. Many people living with sexual anorexia have experienced some trauma in the past, especially during childhood. Emotional neglect, abuse, sexual shaming or the loss of a loved one early in life can all shape how a person feels about sex and closeness later on.
Some people grow up in environments where sexuality is repressed. This might be due to strict cultural or religious expectations, internalised shame or experiences of homophobia. Over time, this can create a deep discomfort or fear around sex that turns into avoidance.
It’s important to remember that sexuality and mental health are both complex. Not everyone will have a clear reason behind what they’re feeling. What matters most is recognising when something doesn’t feel right and knowing that support is available.
Are there links between sexual anorexia and addiction?
There can be, and they often stem from the same place. Childhood trauma is one of the key reasons sexual anorexia can develop, and it’s also a major risk factor for addiction.
Many people who’ve experienced neglect, abuse or early emotional loss find themselves carrying deep pain they don’t know how to process. That pain often finds an outlet, sometimes through avoiding intimacy altogether and sometimes through alcohol or drug use to numb the distress.
In fact, research shows that childhood abuse or neglect is reported in up to 74% of people with alcohol use disorders. Those with this history tend to develop addiction earlier and often struggle with more severe substance use. Sexual abuse, in particular, is more commonly reported by women with addiction.
So when someone develops sexual anorexia after trauma, it’s not uncommon for addiction to develop alongside it or as a way to cope. Both are responses to something painful and both need care and understanding to untangle.
How is sexual anorexia and addiction treated?
While rehab centres primarily focus on treating addiction, many of the therapies used can also support people who are struggling with sexual anorexia, especially when both issues stem from the same underlying causes.
Therapies such as one-to-one counselling, cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT) are commonly used in addiction treatment, and they can help individuals explore and begin to heal from deep-rooted trauma, including experiences of childhood abuse, neglect or shame.
These therapies allow people to work through painful memories in a safe space, understand how those experiences have shaped their relationship with intimacy and begin building healthier emotional responses.
Some people may also benefit from techniques that help manage anxiety, such as desensitisation and relaxation strategies. While these are not formally used to treat sexual anorexia in rehab, they are often introduced during therapy sessions to help people cope with distressing thoughts or emotions which can overlap with the challenges of sexual anorexia.
Group therapy, holistic treatments like yoga or art and supportive aftercare can further help people rebuild confidence while focusing on addiction recovery.
So, even though sexual anorexia isn’t directly treated, the therapeutic work done in rehab can lay a strong foundation for recovery from both addiction and the trauma that may be fuelling other emotional difficulties.
Where can I find help for sexual anorexia and addiction?
If you’re struggling with addiction and also experiencing signs of sexual anorexia, you’re not alone, and there is support available. At Addiction Helper, we can connect you with rehab centres that understand the link between past trauma, emotional pain and substance use.
Call us today for confidential advice and help finding the right treatment for your needs.
Our compassionate team are ready and available to take your call, and guide you towards lasting the lasting addiction recovery you deserve.
Frequently Asked Questions
(Click here to see works cited)
- Roth, Erica. “What Is Sexual Anorexia?” Healthline, Healthline Media, 22 Apr. 2019, www.healthline.com/health/what-sexual-anorexia.
- “Sexual Anorexia.” Drpatrickcarnes, www.drpatrickcarnes.com/sexual-anorexia. Accessed 27 Mar. 2025.
- “Does Anorexia Tie in to Your Sex and Love Addiction? If so, How? Responses to a Questionaire.” Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous SLAA, slaafws.org/anorexia-questionaire/. Accessed 27 Mar. 2025.
- Lotzin A, Grundmann J, Hiller P, Pawils S, Schäfer I. Profiles of Childhood Trauma in Women With Substance Use Disorders and Comorbid Posttraumatic Stress Disorders. Front Psychiatry. 2019 Oct 18;10:674. doi: 10.3389/fpsyt.2019.00674. PMID: 31681026; PMCID: PMC6813657.
